Holidays: Part Two (Teej)

Teej (pronounced TEA-juh)

Teej is a festival for women. And it’s a big deal. The holiday itself is on Sunday, but the celebrations span many days on either side. The weekend before, my family went to see relatives in Kalanki (part of Kathmandu) for a pre-Teej meal. On the Friday before, all of the female teachers at my school headed into the city for some kind of program/event/party. I went with Sydney, another ETA in Lalitpur, to the Teej Celebration with the ACCESS students. (ACCESS is a U.S. Embassy program providing extra English classes to academically talented but financially disadvantaged students in Nepal’s government schools.) I don’t know what I was expecting the program to be like, but it was pretty much all dancing. Oh, except the part where Sydney and I were asked to “say a few words” with less than 30 seconds warning. At least we were able to leave before they asked us to dance in front of everyone!

The group photo, sorry for the quality it wasn't my camera.

One of the dances performed by the access students.

During Teej, women fast to improve their chances of getting a good husband and/or to improve their husband’s chances of living a long and prosperous life. Just another example of women doing all the work! Although men may be at the motivation of the holiday, the festival really is for the women. Everyone dresses up and spends the whole day at the temple singing and dancing. How strict you choose to fast is kind of an individual decision, with more and more women becoming pretty relaxed, although some still commit to abstaining from even water between dawn and dusk. Of course, Nepali stomachs are used to giant platters of rice so in preparation for a single day of fasting you eat like there will be an eternal famine. Fortunately, my family is now accustomed to the fact that I am a dinner time annomally, and they just laugh when I thrust my left hand (unclean) over my plate and yell pugyo! as my aama comes toward me with a second person’s worth of rice.

This was my first opportunity to experience many of the festival sweets, including one called barfi which is actually pretty tasty once you can get the unpleasant vomit image out of your mind. 

 lalmon and yogurt: a ball of fried dough soaked overnight in a sugar syrup

 

 barfi and pehda: both are sweets made from concentrated milk

(Milk can be turned into a lot of things here with varying consistencies, I don't ask too many questions.)
 

Japanese Pears and Gudhpak: the second thing is a mix of dried fruits and some other stuff that I'm not certain how to identify. It kind of reminds me of apple crisp topping in terms of sweetness and the combination of sticky/crumbly.


Jeri: fried concentric circles which are also soaked in a sugar syrup.

Because fried foods aren't unhealthy enough!

 



 Here's what the actual day of Teej looked like at my house.

 

1. Had my toes/feet painted red by a woman who travels around stopping at every house to give married women a full pedicure. (Technically, this happened the day before, but close enough.) Having very red feet from a water soluble dye also meant I had to be very careful about wearing shoes anytime I was on the carpet.

Me and my two sisters. I asked for just the tips of my toes, but something got lost in translation.

 

2. Wore my first sari! If you haven't had the opportunity to sport this traditional wraplike outfit here is the gist. First you put on a "blouse" which is a mix between a bra and a very short cut-off tee shirt. If you wore this "blouse" as a regular blouse anywhere in the United States it would be strongly frowned upon. Then there is a petticoat, which is basically just  cotton skirt, in the same color as the sari, with a drawstring waist. The key to the whole outfit is making sure that waist is tied very tight because that is what all the yardage of the sari is supported by. Over the blouse and petticoat goes an long length of colorful fabric, the sari itself. I would try to describe how to wrap the sari, but I know I couldn't do it justice. There is a lot of tucking, pleating, more tucking, and since I'm new to the whole business also some pinning!

Me and my Aama.

 

3. Girls with long hair often put red or black fabric into their braids. The dhago strands also have ornaments at the bottom for extra sparkle. My hair is a little short so I opted out of this aspect.

 

4. Added 12 additional bangles to my existing dozen; red ones this time even though I'm not married. I also wore pote, a beaded necklace, which is normally only for married women. My host family decided I should get the full experience, and this way none of the Nepali men bothered me. In fact, a lot of people who saw me just assumed I was married to a Nepali already.

5. Affixed a bindi and a tika to my forehead. The bindi is the decorative circle between my eyebrows and the tika is the red smudge closer to my hairline.

 

 

After getting dressed, I went to the temple with my two host sisters and my Nepali aama. There was a long line of women, all glowing in vibrant red cloth, waiting to do puja, worship. The scene was visually exciting, but actually quite calm within the temple. I did not partake in the actual worship of the various deities, but I still felt very honored to be welcomed into a sacred space.

 

 

The final event was a dance party. There were lots of these little gatherings going on in the area, and we had passed at least three during the walk to the temple. At first the plan was to return to a celebration closer to the house, but then my host mom spotted a friend under an awning just around the corner from the temple. We joined a group of women chatting and dancing to pass the time during the fast. We were in a large cement pavilion with speakers set-up for music, but I'm not sure who (if anyone) was really hosting the party. It wasn't long before my host sister became the official DJ, playing music off of her phone. I'm not much of a dancer, and even less so when everyone around is taking my picture on their cell phone camera, but I enjoyed the afternoon letting all sorts of women - old and young - try to teach me how to dance.

 

For me, Teej can be summed up in the word saturated. It is a traditional holiday deeply rooted in practices and rituals from an earlier time, and there is a richness that comes with that history. At the same time, the tone of the day is changing as modern western influences seep further into Nepal. I had a long conversation with my host sister about Teej as it relates to gender equality; ultimately she concluded that Teej is about women displaying their bond with their husbands rather than their servitude. I am quite happy to accept her positive perspective.  The colors are bright and the foods are sweet. For me, Teej was lovely (ramilo chha).

 

A proper family photo: me, Rakshya, Baa, Aama, Raman, and Rashmee.